Insight into to who I am...

After many many years and people telling me that I need to tell my life story, I finally broke down.

I think nothing special of my self, I think I am like everyone else. But over and over the years, people have told me "Wow, were do you get your strength" or " I look towards you for strength"  and from a few of my doctors " Sartee, you are amazing and you still have a positive out look and laugh".

Wow…what was all these people seeing over the years that I didn't see?

Well, here is a quick run down of my life, if I went into detail lord know we can be here. Just by looking at me, you would not see anything special or noticeable as a matter of fact my look - I'm 8 on the  app that rate people looks, my image betrays as people and friends tell me-high end, I hold a BS degree in Computer Science and I am the running joke in the family that I am a professional student (I love to learn). 

Listening to my friends and strangers, I look like my stuff together and life is good!

But, the true story is…..

I was sexual assaulted

I was in 2 abusive marriages

I have 3 uncurable autoimmune disorder(s) - Sarcoidosis, Fibromyaglia, RA

I suffer from depression and anxiety

I had once double my weight within in a few months due to medication ( I gain an extra 125 lb and I got to experience the life as a very over the weight person). All I am going to say is , society is very mean to over weight people and disable people.

I lost the 125 lb and now I have saggy skin all over my body. I am talking about true saggy skin. LOL

I have 2 children. I have a FOREVER 12 year son, who I lost back 2011 4 days after is birthday. He was playing the choking game. I also have a 21 year daughter who has mental issues, from the death of her brother, the abusive of her father but takesBLAMES ME for everything wrong with her life. She drop out high school 3 month before graduating and ran away from home, all this was done 2 months after my son, her brother past away.

Two years ago, I was diagnose with PTSD..oh great, like I don't have enough health issues.

Last year, all my teeth decided to fall out within a year due to the meditation was giving…Once again,…Oh, hell..really? My teeth?

To top things off, I was  diagnose  trigeminal nerve The suicide disease….COOOMMMMMEE OON!

I know my faith says, that God will NOT put no more on you then you can handle but sometimes I feel God is trying to kill me LOL.  I see God, has ALOT of FAITH in me and see something that I don't.

Last year, I got married to a wonderful guy who has 2 kids. We had dated 3.5 years so he was with me when my son past, we were only 5 months in dating. My husband, step up to the plate at the funnel and told me " He will always be her for me". Some how those words were so magical to me… I was so lost in my faith, the world, myself.

As I said, I can go on and on about my life….but as of today, I still do the BIG cheese smile (even with missing teeth, I tried to smile different but I found out it's not me, why should I change), still optimistic and still have my faith, which  has gotten stronger.

I am still the free spirited person, just with new clean glasses on when viewing the world.

To everyone who reads, I see you….

XOXO

SRM

Autoimmune Beauty

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Insomnia Nights

As you can tell I am up and wide eyed at 1:25 am. I feel my body doing it's roller coaster of up and down of my autoimmune disorders symptoms. I knew it was short lived but I did have 1 month with no hip/leg pain and my energy level was high. Two weeks ago I had a visit my new lung doctor for the first time.

 God, I hate meeting new doctors, I have to explain my long drawn out history of my conditions and what meds I can not take and what has only work for me. I call this section of meeting the new doctors, the Tangle. After our first dance, if we click…then I am off to find a new doctor. I don't have time to be a doctor paycheck or experiment.

I have to get it in the doctor head, that she needs to listen to me and hear me out about my body and autoimmune disorder, The new plumbery doctor was nice and listen to me and agreed with me only doing 10 mg predesion a day because that is all that my body will take, My doctor wants to wait and see what the Rhemutologist has to say about my condition, since I am not text book and I almost died  a few times from the side effects of the meds that the doctors want to throw at.

I also went to my acupuncturist for treatment for sciatic pain, which he fits in one treatment. My acupuncturist ask me how did I feel about starting the predesign again? I told him that I did not want to lie to my doctor and I don't feel good about taking it. I know we needs to get my liver enzyme down, my inflammation levels down and get my sarc down from 106.

My acupuncturist agreed that I can see him to be treated for my active sarcoidosis with assistant from the Western doctors, prednisone. So, right now I will be doing my acupuncturist every 2 weeks for now.

Well, I been on 10 mg for a week and a half,,,in the beginning I would just get the hot flashes. My energy starting to lower to fatigue and now my sciatic nerve is coming back, As a matter of fact, I think taking the prednisone my health issues started coming back very slowly.

I was doing fine without the ,prednisone,sleeping good, energy level high, feeling good, very creative etc. Now into my second week, I can't sleep, I am angry,, irrupted, broke out 3 times on my face.

I see my acupuncturist in 2 days for treatments. I will be adding cryotherapy back into my treatment plan plus the oxygen chamber this week. The thing that I need to master is the cause of the inflammation which cause all the pain. I will also be adding 3 deep breathing treats each day as well.

I have 4 weeks to get this done and on faith and the power mind of matter and center my body. I know my numbers will be down.

My body doesn't like chemicals and is hypersensitive to chemicals, etc. I had or trying to balance my body back out and to take those stupid steroid pills just screws everything up. The Neuro doctor was to do something to my spine….ALL HECK NAW,

Just from my past since 2004 dealing with doctor I end up with more issues then I started with,

My faith is carrying me through and putting a smile on my face.

Thanks for letting me do late venting session!

xoxoxo

Autoimmune Beauty

The demon of breathing issues with Sarcoidosis

Having sarcoidosis isn't a fun thing, and at time cause issues in your life by keeping you away from doing the simple things . I remember when my jour any started, I was in the ER at less 3 times a year from abdominal pains. I was having them so much, I just started calling them  episode it event was an unknown unpredictable high intense event.
Every time, I went to the ER I would get the same old explanation, your blood work is fine and everything is normal. This went on for 5 years, I did have a few doctors that told me it was stress and that my current situation I needed to either leave my husband or get maid etc. I remember thinking to myself, "ok stress, everyone has stress this isn't an real issues".

Five years has past when I started to know that I was having breathing issues walking up steps. Hmmmm, maybe it's because I am getting older?" this was my thought of a 25 year old. Funny, how I thought 25 years old was getting old. Anyways, this went on for a few months and I decided to go see my intern doctor because I was having those abdominal pains. She decided to do a CT scan of my abdominal and when the results where in she called me. "Well, your liver,stomach looks fine but the radiologist noted that you have nodels on your lower lungs. The radiologist got a second option because he was concern but the lead radiologist told him, that the models where on the previous scan and it's nothing new".
What the heck!!!!! I told my intern doctor. "Are you serious?" This is/was the first time I heard of this with my lungs. Lord, knows I was hot as hell……to know a conversation and a decision was made on my health without consulting me, At this point, I told my intern doctor"This is my life and my body, I will make the determine factor if this issue is important or not". My intern agree with me and set me up for a biopsy of my lungs.
The results came in…had had sarcoidosis of the lungs.

As patients, we give doctors that power over us to determine what's important with  our health. This is know as the GOD SYMPTOM. The doctors are people just like us…..they don't call Practice Medicine, Practice for nothing.

This event in my life was just a peek into how the bulk of doctors look at their patients and how as patient we give them control. At the end of the day, if they make a mistake with your health it only effects they pockets(money). As far you go, you get to live with the mistakes they have made. Money can not fix, the pain you suffering or scars you are life with for the remaining of your life.

Insight:
You have been with your body from the beginning and know one knows more about your body then you do. Stand up for yourself…the doctors work for you, if they doctor does not meet find ONE THAT MEETS your demands.

XOXO
Autoimmune Beauty

#autoimmunedisorder #autoimmiunebeauty #hoilistc #sacoidosis #takecontrol #synergyofaesthtics

Tasty Protein Shake (The Slender Blend-Protein World)

Yeah, I just got my protein shake chocolate mix from Protein World. I have been watching this company on instagram for awhile and their insttagram site is pretty interesting and appealing. What made me buy the protein mix is because its has its non-gmo, no aspartame and the bulk of their products are vegetarian friendly.

I order the slender blend because I have a bad habit of not eating or eating very late in the date which is very bad for your body.

The website is very simple and very informative and doesn't overload you with fancy terminology. The reviews for this company and their products are positive reviews.

So, I decided to give them a try.

Cons:

It took almost 2 weeks for me to get the product. So, my excitement had fade away and I almost forgot that I had order it. Fibro Fog is no joke LOL.

To mix the shake by hand is a pain in a half. IF you suffer from fibro or have RA, good luck because it took me about 5 min. to get it mix to about 95%. There is still little chucks. So, now a cheap blender is on my list.

It does have whey in it (The Slender Blend)

Pros:

When the company send you your products, they also give you a booklet with receipts, nutritional value. They even put a thank you card, with your name hand written. Just the little things go long way.LOVE that!

The taste is GREAT, it doesn't taste like cardboard. I purchase chocolate and mixed it with coconut milk. It taste just like chocolate milk shake.

I got the slender blend (they have different types of protein blends). It's a nutritional meal replacement and helps aid in weight loss and management PLUS improves skin,hair and nails. A girl gotta love that!

It states that I should see results within one week, if I follow the directions.

My final thoughts are I have tried a few protein drinks and this is FAR the BEST one and  I will be adding this to my diet. So, far I have been drinking it for about 30 min and I have not felt any intolerance issues. So, I think I am good!

Two tubs up for #Proteinworld!

#autoimmunebeauty

XOXO

#autoimmunedisorder #synergyofaesthetics #wellness #holisticfoods #autoimunebeautiesandwarriors

Gluten Free foods you sneaky little devil

The first thing that people think about when going gluten- free is how bad the food is going to taste or there isn't a large selection of organic foods that I am going to like.

This is a false judgement, did you know that you have eaten many gluten-free foods and snacks.

I know everyone has eaten a bag or two of Doritos or eaten a few Hershey chocolates kisses. Guess what? They are gluten free.

Mission Restaurant Style tortilla chips with On the boarder medium salsa on a Friday night…guess what? Gluten- Free. Now the beer that you might be drinking with it isn't gluten free but heck, you have to start somewhere…Right?

Happy hour at TGI Fridays…your order the TGI Fridays cheddar and bacon potatoes skin…gluten free.

Butterfinger…gluten free.

Jelly Belly Jelly Beans….gluten free.

That Saturday or Sunday morning hangover or just cooking breakfast for the family..the Eggs…gluten free.

The list goes on and on, so see you have eaten on many gluten free snacks and you enjoyed. Be open and try more gluten free, even organic foods and snacks. Your body and mind will thank you for it!

"Free your mind and the rest will follow"

#autoimmunebeauty

XOXO

#autoimmunedisorder #wellness #holisticfoods #weightloss #glutenfreefoods

Black Rice…Dang it's GOOD!

As my family and friends know I LOVE trying new healthy foods and unique gadgets. I am the running joke in the family with many things. Anyways, awhile back when I went home to visit my parents, my dad was telling me about this store in Panama City that specialize in rice. My thoughts were, "There's more then 5 types of rice and there's a whole store that specialize on rice?" Hmmmm, I'm  down. But, I never got a chance to visit the store because I spent my time in the specialize Olive Oil store.
This weekend my mother brought me a bag of black rice from the Panama City store. It was small purple bag filled with black rice from Earthly Choice. It doesn't look interesting. So, the 2 days ago I decide to give it a try, heck I am kinda getting bored cooking the same thing.
So, as I was cooking my meal, I pour some rice in my rice cooker …nope, I did not read the direction because I was thinking"How hard could this be?". Well, I burn the pot of rice up.
First, when you add water to the pot rice the water turns this purple black color so I could not see the rice anymore.
Second, I thought I could cook it like the white or brown rice(the instant kind) within 5 min. NOPE!
Third, the pot of rice did not bubble like the brown/white rice.
I ended up cooking and eating the rest of my meal while I waited for the rice to cook to eventually I forgot I was cooking the rice. Even the burning smell was different.

Last night I decided to attempt this again because I wasn't going to let a pot of black rice defeat me. This time I decided to read the back of the bag(dang, I hate reading).
First, you have to bring the water to a boil then reduce the heat and cook the rice for about 35 min. So, no waiting 10 min. until your husband get home to speed cook your rice/meals.

I have to say once you read the direction, the rice came out PERFECT! I must say, it taste DANG GOOD!. The color of the rice throws your mind for a loop and I am still trying to get past this and expand my mind but BLACK RICE, I am giving 2 thumbs UP!

The taste reminds me of Jasmine rice, the rice has favor to me until white rice.

Black rice has crazy benefits:
1 serving has just as much antioxidants as a single serving of blueberries.
IT's loaded with vitamin E and fiber.

This black rice is going to be part of my main diet and anti aging process.

My meal: I only fry food 3 times a year with olive oil. My spinish is cooked with garlic olive oil, with piece of garlic, fried corn bread fried w/olive oil and mac & cheese skim milk, low fat cheeses,ground mustard and other spices.

XOXO


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If you want to know if something is working…STOP taking it!

I crack myself up sometimes, I use to joke with guys that I was dating about how high maintenance I am but at least once a month I found out that I wasn't joking. My husband tease me that I am a paper dragon…I think I am the boy in the bubble. Anyways, since February of this year I had a extreme vision change, like one day I could see well then the next day my vision went veery blurry to the effect that I can not drive at night. So after waiting a few months, thinking my vision will change back(it never did) I took myself to the eye doctor. I got fitted with brand new contacts, yes I am still a little vain lol. Well, I still could not see out the contacts so I went back a month later. Surprise my eye sight/vision had changed again. The eye doctor thinking that it might be my sarcoidosis my have come into my eyes. Oh, great! So off I go to see a specialist. well after a few test the eye doctor tells me, that my retina looks great and it's just me getting older( Heck,I am 40 years old). Ahhh, over night my vision change then with a month it changes again??? The eye doctors, just repeated his self…yeah, you are just getting older. Heck, I am no doctor but I know your eye vision can not change over night then again within a month.
So, I go back to my original eye doctor who did my contact exam and he reads the retinal doctor reports/results and just shakes his head. He re exams my eyes again and guess what..my vision had changed again( to worst). The eye doctor is jus stumped, he doesn't believe the retina doctors report. Me too I think to myself. So, my eye doctor tells me he doesn't understand why my eyes are doing what they are doing, he going to go with me just having extreme dry eyes and the anti histamine is creating my vision to get worst. Ok, I am going to go with that since I have bad allergy issue(especially the Spring) since I started taking the anti histamine in February. I have to take it every single day and personally I didn't think it was doing me any good but it's a mind think right? So , last week I decide to stop taking the anti histamine, I did not see any change in my vision…I didn't feel anything. I thought to myself, I knew that anti histamine wasn't doing anything. Then yesterday, I woke up feeling sick, nose all stuffed up, throat hurt(my God did I run across someone who was sick over the weekend?).
I have leaner with living with an autoimmune disorder you always have to do a self check before going to the doctor. So, I was thinking to myself "What have I done different within the last week"? Ding Ding DING..I stop taking the anti histamine(the pills that I did not think was working). Lord, I need to figure out if the anti histamine was effecting my vision…I want to see clear again(without glasses), dang vanity. Well by the end of the day, I was searching my house all over like a crack addicted looking for those stupid anti histamine.
Today(the second day) I still am feeling stuffy, throat hurt, running nose and coughing up muscus.

Yeah, I guess my anti histamine was doing its job.

XOXO

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